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Saint of the Day: St. John Vianney
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A sister is more than a friend; she’s the other half of our hearts

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Dicas de Amor - Aleteia Spain - published on 02/16/17

Whoever is lucky enough to have a sister knows very well that she is an authentic treasure we need to value and protect.

A sister is more than a friend. The bond we establish with her goes beyond family ties. She’s beside us in our battles — an unbreakable pillar we can always lean on.

Sure, we have differences … and our growing-up years were many times a battleground of competitions, arguments, clothes to hoard and jealousies to hide. But the years passed and brought us to understand the importance of this bond.

It’s often said that our real family is the one we choose, not the one assigned to us by blood lines. And there’s truth in that; we’ve all experienced it. But many times, the union we establish with a sister goes beyond any friendships. There’s an emotional and biological connection, an intimacy that is so exclusive, that one who is lucky enough to have a sister knows very well that she is an authentic treasure we need to value and protect.

More than a family bond

Perhaps some time has passed since you’ve last spoken with your sister. Life sometimes puts us at difficult crossroads where pride weighs on us, or feelings are still hurt over that time when we weren’t very tactful. Yet, even if there’s irritation and we’ve put distance between us, the heart still feels wounded and it’s hard to keep up this separation, this enmity. In the end, she’s still our sister — older or younger, but the one who always guided and counseled us.

A phone call, a giggle, a memory … and suddenly our connection is back again, despite the distance, despite the problems.

Raised in the same house, but with different personalities

Sometimes it’s literally unbelievable how, despite receiving the same education and living the same things, sisters turn out so differently.

— There are the reactionary and rebellious ones, who taught us to defend our space and our rights, to have a voice and to know how to choose what’s best for us.

— Others are a sea of tranquility and balance who know how to offer valuable counsel. They are our support on difficult days, who make us feel heard and understood.

There’s no reason sisters should have the same personality. Just as children aren’t carbon copies of their parents, among siblings it’s natural that there would be many different interests and ways of reacting to the same thing. This is just another factor that helps us grow, as we can complement each other in so many ways.

When words aren’t necessary

We don’t have to tell a sister that we’re not doing so well. When we’re face-to-face, the emotional bond and the blood ties make her able to perceive, almost instantaneously, that something’s up. What comfort this closeness and concern give us!

Though we might have friends, a spouse and even our own parents, a sister shares with us a whole legacy of stories and situations that will make her understand very well how she can help us.

Neither distance nor differences are an obstacle

It doesn’t matter if our lives have led us in distinct directions as we’ve formed our own families; perhaps now there’s a whole ocean between us. But our concern and our attention will always be there. It’s natural, almost instinctive. Calls, messages … there will always be a way to count on the support of this other half of our hearts, who we miss so much.

No one tells us the truth as sincerely as a sister

Perhaps it’s the years, or so much that we’ve shared, but we know well that our sister will always tell us the truth with sincerity — and without much anesthesia. A sister doesn’t feel a need to be condescending, and even less to puff us up with false flattery. She knows that sincerity is a demand of our family ties and it is, without a doubt, what we expect from her. A sister will always be more than a friend because we are beside her through so many ups and downs — the experience of our childhood (so often complicated), the mistakes of our youth when she was there supporting us, and that maturity that we’ve both reached — all personal triumphs we share and that have left us marvelously united.

Seals on the heart

If right now you are far from your sister because of some small disagreement, swallow your pride and realize that it’s not worth it.

Life is a lot simpler than we think, and a sister’s support is a special gift — we shouldn’t let a day pass without it.

If you agree, share this with your sisters!

[Translated and adapted from Aleteia Spanish, through Dicas de amor]

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