Get Aleteia delivered to your inbox. Subscribe here
Subscribe to Aleteia's free newsletter: Goodness. Beauty. Truth. No yelling.
Sign me up!

More from Aleteia

Not Prepared to Donate?

Here are 5 ways you can still help Aleteia:

  1. Pray for our team and the success of our mission
  2. Talk about Aleteia in your parish
  3. Share Aleteia content with friends and family
  4. Turn off your ad blockers when you visit
  5. Subscribe to our free newsletter and read us daily
Thank you!
Team Aleteia

Subscribe

Aleteia

What’s the best way to receive a compliment?

COMPLIMENT
Shutterstock
Share

Most people respond in one of three unhealthy ways; here's how to break the habit.

Many people find it unbearably awkward to accept a compliment. When someone gives us a kind word, we often don’t freely accept it.

Psychologists Suzie Pilegi Pawelski and James Pawelski have identified three unhealthy ways that people respond to compliments: deflect, reciprocate, and discount.

When given a compliment many people feel obligated to brush it off, deny it, or to offer a compliment in return. Instead, the healthier response to a compliment is also the simplest: accept with gratitude.

Pawelski and Pawelski encourage direct eye-contact with a verbal “thank you.” You can also take this opportunity to enjoy the moment and open a conversation without citing reasons why the compliment is undeserved. For example, you could share a detail about the story behind whatever they chose to compliment.

Learning to accept a compliment can take vulnerability and humility, but it can also release us from a lot of social stress and open us up to more fruitful interactions.

Newsletter
Get Aleteia delivered to your inbox. Subscribe here.
Aleteia offers you this space to comment on articles. This space should always reflect Aleteia values.
[See Comment Policy]