Everyone wants to be happily married, but how do we achieve it? One centenarian shares her secrets...
Pilar Suevos Fernández de Jove has great wisdom about marriage, given her own decades-long love story, and a front-row seat to the marriages of her six children and many grandchildren and great-grandchildren.
At 102 years old, Pilar, who lives in the small town of Vilarrube, in Spain, sums up her past century by saying that she has had “a very happy life, thank God.” She doesn’t want to take the secret of her happy life to her grave, so she decided to share it in a YouTube video that’s just over two minutes long. (The video is below in Spanish, with subtitles in English.)
So what’s the secret of happiness in marriage?
First, Pilar says, “You need to think before you get married.” To her, that means seeing what your boyfriend or girlfriend is like, but also learning what their family is like. This way, you can avoid many unpleasant surprises in the future.
She explains that “there is plenty of foolishness” when it comes to romantic relationships, and she’s probably right. Although the statistics and causes are complicated, many marriages end in divorce, and as many as 45% of pregnancies in the USA are unintended. Something doesn’t seem to add up, and Pilar makes the logical observation that when we use our head and not just our feelings, we tend to make better decisions (and not just about marriage).
Pilar adds other ingredients to her recipe for a strong marriage:
- Holding strong moral principles.
- An upbringing with parents who give you solid guidance and example.
- Surrounding yourself with friends who are good people.
- Having people in your life who will tell you honestly when you go astray.
And, finally, an essential ingredient that has to mix with all the rest: “Healthy, good love.”
For Pilar, the essence of a happy life can be summed up in just a few words:
“You always have to respect love. Love is a wonderful thing when it’s true: the family, and God, who is in our heart. That’s marvelous.”
Here you can see Pilar’s video on YouTube (with English subtitles):