There’s something quietly reassuring about waving to a neighbor across the street or sharing an extra tomato from your garden. Yet, according to a new Pew Research Center survey, only one in four Americans say they know all or most of their neighbors, while 12% don’t know any. Less than half say they trust their neighbors deeply.
Still, beneath these numbers lies something hopeful: most people are still willing to help. Whether it’s watering plants or collecting mail, Americans continue to show up for those who live nearby — even if they don’t know their names. That says something about who we are and the communities we long for.
In fact, the survey found that three-quarters of adults say they’d help a neighbor who’s out of town, and two-thirds would deliver a meal to a neighbor who’s sick. So while relationships may have grown thinner, the instinct for kindness is still strong.
The hidden power of local connection
We often think of community as something big and abstract — but most of it begins right outside our front door. Good neighbors offer more than borrowed tools or the occasional wave. They provide safety, conversation, and a gentle reminder that we’re not alone.
That might be especially important now. Many people — young parents, retirees, city dwellers — are craving genuine connection in daily life. Knowing someone nearby who notices if your lights haven’t been on, or who checks in when your kid’s home sick, makes a real difference.
As the survey also showed, neighbors remain a trusted source of local news. While fewer Americans rely on TV or newspapers, nearly three in four say they hear local updates through friends, family, and neighbors. In other words, those front porch chats still matter.
Small gestures that make a big impact
If building community sounds daunting, take heart: it doesn’t have to be. A friendly “hello,” an offer to bring in the bins, or a simple check-in with someone who lives alone can go a long way.
Here are a few easy ways to start:
Greet with a smile: It sounds obvious, but a genuine "hello" builds warmth over time.
Be open to small talk: Whether at the mailbox or on a walk, short conversations can lead to real friendships.
Share the extras: Baked too many cookies? Drop some off. (Okay, this is a ridiculous example, my kids would devour the lot, but you know what I mean!) Have spare garden tools? Offer them. Do you have any baby clothes you might be able to share with a pregnant neighbor? Pop around and offer to give, or lend, them. It might lead to a further conversation, babysitting opportunities for your older kids, and hopefully friendship. Look for those occasions to share.
Start a tradition: A seasonal get-together, a community noticeboard, or even a WhatsApp group for those on your street, can create natural meeting points.
The Catholic heart of community
At its core, neighborliness isn’t just about convenience — it’s about love. The Gospel calls us to care for those close by, not just in grand gestures, but in the quiet, daily ways we show up. Being a good neighbor might not make headlines, but it reflects a deeper truth: we’re made for connection.
We might not all be best friends with the people next door. But we can choose to be kind, available, and attentive. And perhaps that’s the beginning of something beautiful.
