Whether at a neighbor’s house or in a foreign country, we’ve all found ourselves in situations where the local custom is different from what we’re used to. Maybe we’re required to take off our shoes at the door, whereas we keep them on at home; or french fries are served with vinegar, or gravy and cheese, instead of ketchup. It’s likely that we’ve shrugged and accepted the situation, saying, “When in Rome…” perhaps without even finishing the aphorism with “do as the Romans do.” What we might not realize is that this common expression is linked to St. Augustine!
From Africa to Italy
This great saint and doctor of the Church was born in northern Africa, in Tagaste. The city was located in what is now Algeria, a land recently visited by Pope Leo XIV. At the time, the region was part of the Roman Empire. Although Augustine was raised by a Christian mother, he didn’t embrace the faith immediately.
In 383, at the age of 28, already an author and accomplished teacher of rhetoric, he left Africa for Rome. From there, he went to Milan to occupy a teaching position. While in Milan, he met St. Ambrose, who guided the young man’s faith journey to full Catholicism and eventually baptized him.
Wise advice
In his Letter 54 (to Januarius), St. Augustine recounts how his mother, St. Monica, was perplexed by the different observances of fasting in Rome and Milan (which in turn may have varied from what they were used to in northern Africa). She had gone to Milan in northern Italy to be with her son and didn’t know whether to continue fasting on Saturdays as they did in Rome—or not, as in the north. Augustine asked his mentor, Ambrose, how to answer his mother’s concern. The great bishop replied:
When I visit Rome, I fast on Saturday; when I am here, I do not fast. On the same principle, do you observe the custom prevailing in whatever Church you come to, if you desire neither to give offense by your conduct, nor to find cause of offense in another's.
This story is considered the origin of the saying, “When in Rome, do as the Romans do,” in its various formulations. St. Augustine was struck by the wisdom of this counsel, and wrote that he considered it “as if I had received it by an oracle from heaven.”
He goes on in his letter to explain that this principle applies to matters where there is no definite right or wrong answer based on Scripture, the Tradition of the Church, or on “manifest good influence on manners.” He’s not advocating for relativism, but for adaptation to valid local customs.
It’s interesting that this principle has its origin in a religious context, whereas today we apply it to any situation where we have to adapt to the traditions around us. However, there's no denying that its wisdom is equally applicable in any context!
