How to throw an old-school backyard birthday party

As a mom of four, I’m a big fan of the old-school, low-key backyard birthday party. We can celebrate the birthday child without spending a fortune and stressing ourselves out.

I think kids often prefer this kind of party, too. Parties at a venue are often so structured that the kids barely get to connect with each other, and there’s pressure to follow the schedule and be out by a certain time instead of relaxing and enjoying the party.

As parents, we are fueled by over-the-top Pinterest images and often feel pressure to pull together some elaborate extravaganza for our kids’ birthdays. But in my experience, kids enjoy simple parties the most.  

For example, one of my kids’ favorite birthday parties we ever attended was just donuts and juice (and coffee for the moms and dads!) at a playground on a Saturday morning. Another was running in a sprinkler with water guns in the backyard. 

It’s us, the adults, complicating things unnecessarily. Let’s do ourselves a favor and go back to the simple, classic parties we all loved as kids. I love that this kind of party makes it so much easier for my family practice the virtue of hospitality frequently.

Kids just want to play and eat a treat or two, and parents just want their kids to expend energy without expending their own. We can pull this off with minimal expense and stress, and maximum fun.

Here’s my formula for a simple and easy backyard party: 

Summer is the perfect opportunity to pull off this kind of party. If you’re ready to throw a delightful and low-stress backyard* party, read on!

*Note: If you don't have a backyard, these party suggestions are all easily transferrable to a local park. You may need to reserve a space ahead of time.

About six weeks before the party, pick the theme, as this will simplify planning the activities and food. My kids often choose favorite books, like The Hobbit; once my history-loving son had a party themed around Ancient Rome, while my daughter’s last birthday was themed around “forest princesses.” You might choose “tea party,” “construction,” “barnyard animals,” “ballerinas” … the sky’s the limit! I usually send an Evite to 3-5 close friends of the birthday child around this time, too.

Honestly, less is more when it comes to organized activities. I choose one craft or game, maybe one of each, and keep these very simple.

The activity might be “digging in the sandbox with toy vehicles” for a construction party, or “running around the yard in a chariot race” for our Ancient Rome party, or “drawing our favorite mythical animals” for a forest princess party, or just water balloons if it’s hot out. 

My kids often want to do “an obstacle course” for their birthday parties, so I use stuff we already have (hula hoops, plastic cones, the sprinkler, a play structure) to create a path through the yard for the kids to follow. It's so simple but the kids always love it!

If you play classic party games, like the limbo or musical chairs, keep in mind games that work for multiple ages and are easy to explain.

If you have the kids make a craft, it can double as a party favor. I don’t usually do party favors, in the spirit of keeping things simple and uncomplicated like the old-school parties I remember from my childhood, but a craft or a candy bag from a pinata both work great if you want the guests to have something to take home.

It’s so tempting when we see a million cute ideas on Pinterest, but resist the temptation to plan and schedule every minute. The kids really just want to play together for most of the party, so leave most of the time open for them to run around the yard inventing their own fun. 

Meanwhile the parents can chat, sip a beverage, and spend some relaxing time together. This time is really the magic of a backyard party!

Opt for simple food that’s easy to set up and ideally can be made ahead of time. Sandwiches, hot dogs, that kind of thing. When in doubt, you can’t go wrong grabbing pizza and a sheet cake from Costco and calling it a day! Or keep it even easier and have the party between meals so you don’t even need to serve a meal. 

When you choose the food, run through your paper goods as well. Do you need plates and cups for the party? How will you serve drinks? I usually put out a jug of ice water with cups and a cooler of seltzers and juice. 

The cake can also be easy. One of my kids likes to have donuts stacked on a plate for her cake. Another always wants an ice cream sandwich cake, which is a cinch to make and hugely popular with everyone. Last year, my five-year-old wanted a stack of chocolate chip cookies for her cake, which was delightfully easy to put together.

Sometimes I have time to make my kids’ favorite sourdough chocolate cake with homemade buttercream frosting, but I’ve used a box cake mix too, and everyone was just as happy! 

You get the idea: Keep it simple so you can actually have fun and enjoy the party, too!

If it’s hot out, you might want to set up a canopy for shade and plan on some water activities for the kids.

If it’s going to rain and you need to move the party inside, you might consider asking parents to drop off kids so there are fewer attendees. 

And think through the overall flow: Maybe set up an open-ended activity, like coloring pages, for kids to do while waiting for all the guests to arrive. Make sure you have birthday candles. That kind of thing.

And that’s about it! A backyard party does not have to be expensive at all, and it doesn’t have to stress you out. Instead, it’s an opportunity for you and your child to spend time with friends and have fun. 

I hope you have the best time throwing your own old-school backyard birthday party this summer!