Aleteia

How to survive motherhood by imagining that you’re an orchestra conductor

Woman ; Bandmaster ; Music ; Orchestra
Geartooth Productions I Shutterstock
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Try this if you’re consumed by the frantic pace of family life.

Do you often feel swamped, despite having carefully planned out everything? Are you constantly trying to make family activities run smoothly, and forced to deal with frequent squabbling? If so, what can you do to break this cycle? 

“For when I am weak, then I am strong”

It‘s naive to imagine that with all the things you must do, your workload will get lighter, the number of kids in your care will go down, and your busy professional schedule will be renegotiated. But what really makes your day difficult is that help seems nowhere to be found. Our highly individualistic society can breed guilt in mothers who cannot offer constant undivided attention to each of their offspring.

But what if you tried a different tack, and decided to rely on your kids? Wasn’t it St. Paul who said: “For when I am weak, then I am strong” (2Cor. 12:10)? Don’t try to be a perfect mom; instead picture yourself as an orchestra conductor, seeking harmony without necessarily recalling each score in detail. The conductor lets all of his musicians play together and gives each the chance to shine. Playing violin alone is a performance; playing a concerto together is a colorful journey. What good is the first a violin if he or she can’t give the right tempo to others? 

Finding the right pace

Encourage your kids’ love for one another and acknowledge the talent of each by putting it at the disposal of the whole group. So, a brother or a sister who is good in math or in writing can help the whole brood with their homework. Each of them deserves gratitude from those they’ve helped out, including mom!

Little by little your children will become sisters and brothers in Christ who can play out the symphony of their life with the right tempo, directed by a baton you hold in your hand.  

Inès de Franclieu

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