Aleteia

Tired of sharing a bed with your spouse? Here’s some advice that might help

Couple, Sleep, Snoring, Night
© Tero Vesalainen
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There are ways to ensure a better sleep in order to preserve the joys of sharing the same bed.

Snoring, kicking, tugging at the blanket, or taking up all the space … Sharing a bed with someone else can be tricky. There are some who can never imagine sleeping alone, while others dream of separate beds so they can finally get some rest!

There are solutions

Charley is very concerned about his wife who no longer wants to put up with his snoring. She can’t get any sleep and feels tired all the time. To his greatest dismay, she wants a separate bedroom, even though she has no grudge against him. 

It’s the same for Luke, who needs more space if he is to get any rest. His wife’s body close to his prevents him from “getting comfortable.” “It’s a territorial conflict,” notes his wife with humor.

Then there are Bruno and Maddy, who can’t imagine sleeping apart. They see this time as an opportunity to share a moment of intimacy. “We’ve noticed that we needed more space as we got older. So, we got a king size bed.” It’s a practical solution … so is getting two separate blankets to avoid the nightly “tug of war.” 

It can take time to find the right solution: snorers have hard time realizing that they make it impossible for their partners to sleep in the same room. If this is the case, you should consult a physician, who can no doubt propose some testing and a treatment plan.

Physical closeness and fidelity

When it comes to this issue, we have to find a way to balance our personal needs with the well-being of our spouse and relationship. Physical closeness, which is often hard to find with our spouse in the busyness of our day, stimulates the production of oxytocin, otherwise known as the fidelity hormone. If we can figure out how keep this strong, we are wise to not deprive ourselves of it!

Marie-Noël Florant